conceived, choreographed and directed by MICHAEL BENNET
book by JAMES KIRKWOOD and NICHOLAS DANTE
music by MARVIN HAMLISCH
lyrics by EDWARD KLEBAN

FOLLOWS "At the Ballet"

(AL finishes KRISTINE's phrases throughout.)

KRISTINE (speaks) AL (sings)
See, I really couldn't sing. I could never really sing. What I couldn't do was Sing!
I have trouble with a note.
It goes all around my throat.
It's a terrifying thing.
See, I really couldn't hear which note was lower or was higher.
Which is why I disappear when someone says, "Let's start a choir."
Hey, when I begin to shriek.
It's a cross between a squeak.
And a quiver or a moan.
It's a little like a croak.
Or the record player broke.
What it doesn't have is tone.
Oh, I know you're thinking what a crazy ding-a-ling,
But what I really couldn't sing.
I could never really sing.
What I couldn't do was sing!

AL (guiding her, sings)
Three blind mice.

KRISTINE (sings off pitch)
Three blind mice.
(speaks)
It isn't intentional.

AL (speaks)
She's doing her best.
(sings again)
Jingle bells, Jingle bells

KRISTINE (sings off pitch)
Jingle bells, Jingle bells
(speaks)
It really blows my mind.

AL (speaks)
She gets depressed.

KRISTINE (speaks) AL (sings)
But what I lack in pitch I sure make up in power!
And all my friends say I am perfect for the

KRISTINE (sings off pitch)
shower.

KRISTINE (speaks) AL (sings)
Still I'm terrific at a dance.
Guys are comin' in their pants.
I'm a birdie on the wing.
But when I begin to chirp.
They say, "Who's the little twerp
Goin' 'Pong' instead a 'Ping' "
And when Christmas comes and all my friends go

GROUP
Caroling,

KRISTINE (speaks) AL (sings)
It is so dishearten -ning.
It is so disquiet -ting.
It is so discourag -ging.
Darling, please stop answer -ring!
See, I really couldn't sing
I could never really sing.
What I couldn't do was

GROUP
Do re mi fa sol la ti do
DO ti la sol fa mi re do

GIRLS
La,

KRISTINE (off-key)
La,

GIRLS
La,

KRISTINE (off-key)
L